Hot Married Sex

Yesterday I put forward the idea that sexual tension leads to hot sex. If this is the case, how can we increase the amount of sexual tension in our marriage without damaging the relationship itself? Well, there are in fact several ways, and the most useful are as follows:

Retain Some Independence – Although it’s inevitable that couples grow closer the more time they spend together, you should try to make sure that both of you are able to retain some level of independence. Enjoy separate hobbies and interests, have a few non-mutual friends and generally work at keeping at least some aspect of yourself out of the “couple” category. This will ensure that you and your partner don’t become clones with opposing genitalia, and helps keep sexual tension alive.

Agree To Disagree – Couples who insist that they have to agree on everything, no matter how trivial, are inadvertently quelling the sexual tension in their marriage. Just because you’re married to someone doesn’t mean that you have to have exactly the same views on minor matters. Yes, broad agreement on major issues is important, but a little disagreement about whether it’s better to spit or swallow, or watch porn on DVD rather than on a computer (to provide just two appropriately sexy examples) can be a good thing, because it increases tension a notch or two.

Surprise Your Spouse – If your spouse can predict your every move and word, sexual tension will be low. Increase it by breaking out of habitual patterns and deliberately surprising your partner every now and again. Use explicit language if you’re normally shy and reserved in bed. Reveal one of your most secret fantasies in the middle of a conversation about utility bills. “Forget” to wear underwear and make sure your partner discovers your omission. And if you’re the kind of person who does all of that anyway, go to the opposite extreme and surprise your spouse with flowers, chocolates or a new CD.

There are plenty of other ways to increase sexual tension in a safe way, so I’ll leave you to think up some of your own. Just remember that sexual tension is directly related to difference and surprise, so the more different and surprising you can be in areas that aren’t of any great importance, the more you will be able to keep the tension high and enjoy the hot sex that is associated with it.