Hot Married Sex

Many people say that they would like to have sex more often than they do right now, and the good news is that having more sex is quite easy. All you have to do is forget about the frequency and focus on improving the quality of the sex you already have. If you do this, both of you will naturally want to have hot sex more often.

The problem for too many couples is that the sex they have is rudimentary, repetitive and boring. This being the case, it isn’t surprising that it only takes place once a week or once a month. But when the sex is hot, varied and exciting, both partners will want to enjoy it more often. In other words, if you look after the quality, the quantity will take care of itself.

The biggest enemy of hot sex is routine. Even the hottest sexual scenario which originally makes him hard and her damp at the sheer mention of it will lose its appeal if it is repeated over and over with no variety. You should therefore make an effort to shake things up on a regular basis, and avoid doing the same thing twice in one week. If you can avoid doing the same thing twice in a month, so much the better.

Married couples have so many options when it comes to having hot sex that achieving this isn’t as difficult as it might sound. You can role play a dozen different scenarios, have sex in at least half a dozen different places and try scores of sexual positions. One day she can be Miss Scarlet in the kitchen with the whipped cream, and the next time he can be Colonel Shafter in the bedroom with the blindfold. You can take erotic photographs or videos of each other, talk dirty, or even take the wedding dress out of storage and rediscover the erotic potential of the good old-fashioned missionary position. Make as much noise as you can during sex on one day, and try to be totally silent the next… I could continue listing different ways of making sex varied and novel, but if you don’t get the idea by now then you aren’t paying attention.

Unless one partner has a medical problem which causes low libido (in which case a visit to the doctors is in order) most couples can enjoy more sex by forgetting about frequency and focusing on making the sex that they do have as hot as varied as possible, as just described.

Virtual sex is something that seems to be increasingly common, thanks in no small part to online worlds such as Second Life. These allow you to adopt an on-screen persona known as an avatar and enjoy a virtual life in a surprisingly well rendered 3D environment. With the content of the virtual world being created by the users themselves, it isn’t a shock to discover that sex plays as big a part of virtual life as it does real life.

Someone who is totally new to virtual worlds might be surprised to learn that in a place like Second Life you can visit strip clubs, hire escorts, explore BDSM dungeons, take in a porn movie or simply meet a girlfriend and get jiggy in the privacy of your own virtual home. Players can even get married in Second Life.

With full support for voice chat on private channels as well as text chat, virtual sex in a world like Second Life can be likened to animated phone sex. And whilst many married couples would consider such virtual sex to be tantamount to cheating if their spouse got involved with a third party, couples can play the game together and explore their sexual fantasies in a whole new way.

If you have two computers in the house, you could both log onto Second Life, spend a little time making your avatars look attractive (the “noob” look isn’t very appealing) and then experience various sexual scenarios with each other. Fancy having sex outdoors with a dozen or more people watching? There are open sex areas where you can do just that. Want to have a more romantic experience in a virtual ballroom (perhaps because you have kids who make the real thing impossible right now)? You can do that to. In fact, as long as it’s legal and consenting, there’s nothing you can’t do in Second Life.

Virtual sex isn’t for everyone by any means, and after dabbling for a while my wife and I discovered we preferred having a good old-fashioned conversation. That said, we did enjoy playing with slave / master scenarios, being naughty in public and making our avatars as sexually brazen as possible. And, as a form of high-tech foreplay, the game was quite effective.

Of course, Second Life isn’t all about sex, and there’s lots of other things that you and your spouse can do in this virtual world. Make friends from around the world, go for a walk through a rain forest, visit Amsterdam, New York, Paris or Venice. If you can imagine it, the chances are you can do it.

Creating a Second Life character and playing the game costs nothing (though you may want to upgrade your account for a few dollars so that you can buy your own land if you intend to play long term) so if you fancy experiencing virtual sex with your spouse just to see what it’s like, you can do so. Simply visit the Second Life web site to get started.

Eyes open orgasms are, as the term suggests, orgasms that you have with your eyes open. Most people have got into the habit of coming with their eyes closed, and although there’s nothing wrong with that, making a point of working towards and experiencing orgasm with your eyes open has a number of surprising benefits.

The first is that you will become more aware of how your body is responding to what you and your partner are doing. With your eyes closed it’s easy to just allow yourself to get carried along by sensations on a largely unconscious level, but when you have your eyes open you’ll connect the experience with the action that triggered it. For example, that delightful ache in your pussy might be due to the way your husband uses his fingers in just the right place. If you know this, you can identify exactly what turns you on more than anything else and, when the mood strikes, focus on it.

Next, having your eyes open allows you to make a deeper connection with your partner. Think about when the two of you first met and you might recall spending a long time looking into those eyes. But when was the last time you looked into them – really looked into them – for several minutes? If it’s more than a month (and for some people it’s years) keeping your eyes open and fixed on your partner during sex could rekindle some very deep feelings you’d forgotten you had.

Finally, when you achieve orgasm itself with your eyes open, you’ll find that it feels quite a bit different to an eyes closed orgasm. Rather than feeling yourself orgasm in a sea of blackness that has no real roots in time or space, you will notice that your orgasm feels more grounded, somehow more “real” and in many cases, more intense.

It has to be said that it generally takes longer to have an orgasm with your eyes open than it does to have one with your eyes closed (this is especially so for women), and you might need to give the idea a try several times before you finally succeed. But when you do, I’m confident that you’ll be glad you made the effort.

Uniform sex is a term used to describe sex where one or both partners is dressed in a role-play outfit that the other finds arousing. Common uniforms used for sex games between a husband and wife include police, naval, nursing and military uniforms, nun’s habits, French maid costumes and dominatrix outfits.

Although simply wearing a uniform might be enough to turn your partner on, for uniform sex to be most satisfying the person wearing it should try to adopt the persona and characteristics of the character they are portraying. Think of yourself as an actor or actress who is about to play a part, and when you step into your uniform, step into character.

Some couples like the idea of having sex in uniform, but aren’t confident in their ability to “carry it off” in terms of personality and character. It is for those readers that I offer my four-step quick-and-easy guide to acting in sex uniform scenarios:

1 – Identify A Role Model
First, think of someone who really is like the character that you want to portray, For example, if you want to wear a saucy French maid uniform, think of any saucy French maids you have seen on television or in movies.

2 – Identify Their Traits
Having found a role model, study them and identify the main traits that make them what they are. How do they talk? How do they walk? How do they use their eyes? What body language do they use? You can discover all of this from watching the television shows or movies that your chosen role model character appears in. Think of this as acting class.

3 – Adopt A New Name
Next, adopt a new name that is more in keeping with your character. If your own name would suit the role then by all means stick with it, otherwise choose a name that fits the uniform. This will help both you and your partner to view the character as being real.

4 – Be Your Role Model
Now it’s time to put everything together so that you and your partner can enjoy some hot uniform sex. To do this, put on the outfit and – as you do – imagine yourself stepping into the shoes of the role model you selected previously. Talk the way they talk, walk the way they walk, use your eyes and body language in the same way, and so on. Also, make sure that your partner has been instructed to view you as the character (and not their spouse) whenever you are in uniform. The more you can both immerse yourself in the game, the more satisfying it will be.

Uniform sex takes a little planning and preparation, but if you and your partner are willing to suspend disbelief and play along with each other, it can be a great fantasy experience. Fancy having sex with a member of the police force, a doctor or nurse or a television newsreader without breaking those marriage vows? Well, now you can. So the question is, who are you going to be tonight?

Does your sex life ever feel like it’s become something of a routine? If so, you’re not alone – it’s a common complaint among married couples; even those who have a routine of hot sex. For that reason I’d now like to present you with six ways to vary your sexual routine that might prove useful…

Have Fully Clothed Sex
Most of us get naked when we have hot sex, so try keeping your clothes on for a change. Yes, I’m talking about fully clothed sex. It can be more erotic than you might imagine. All that lifting of skirts, pulling aside of panties and unzipping of flies. Give it a go. But pay for your own dry cleaning.

Make It Wet
Do you use lube? Where do you put it. Thought so. Stop being so predictable and try using it everywhere. Grease each other up and then get down and dirty. Be careful though, it’s slippery when wet.

Choose Sex Names
Ask your partner to choose a sex name that represents their unbridled lust, and do the same for yourself. Then, when you’re having sex, be sure to use those names – a lot. This idea is similar to role play, but requires a lot less planning. That said, it can just as hot if you allow yourselves to get into the spirit of things.

Make Love Like A Porn Star
Watch a porn movie (or a sexy 18 movie if porn isn’t your bag) with the explicit intention of copying your favourite scene. Tip for the guys: that movie with the gang bang scene in the garage probably isn’t a good one – choose a straightforward male-female scene that your wife enjoys as much as you do.

Wear Masks
Okay, so maybe you laughed when you watched Eyes Wide Shut, but masks have plenty of erotic potential because they give you both and “excuse” (as if one were necessary) to really let loose. You’ll be surprised at how hot things can get when you both agree to wear a simple mask, so get your ass to the fancy dress store ASAP.

Oppose Your Routine
My final suggestion is that you deliberately oppose your routine by doing things in the exact opposite way that you normally do them. Do you normally fuck with the lights on? Turn them off. Do you have hot sex at night? Try the mornings or afternoons. Is it always in bed? Get busy in the lounge, or why not hire a hotel room for a weekend?

None of the six tips presented here require a degree in rocket science, but they can all fire up the booster engines of your hot married sex life. Ready to launch? Then get to it…