Hot Married Sex

How hot are you? That’s a question that few people ever ask themselves with any seriousness, but one that can help you to pack more sizzle into your relationship than any other.

When most of us think about our relationships, we tend to assess the other people in it. How hot is my wife/husband? Could they be hotter? What can I do to help them to let go of their inhibitions and unleash their inner slut/bad boy?

Whilst such questions can be useful in some circumstances, I have another question that is even more powerful: Would I get turned on if I lived with me?

Think about that question for a moment and imagine that you’ve traded places with your significant other. Then, through their eyes, honestly evaluate how much of a turn on you really are. Are you the kind of person that you’d like to live with? Are you as sexy, funny, charming, loving, caring, honest and considerate as you normally think you are? Or are you sometimes demanding, selfish, inconsiderate and deceitful? And would you really and truly be delighted to live with yourself for one year, five years, ten years and more?

Most of us who consider such questions honestly will admit that there is certainly room for improvement, and that’s a good thing, because it gives us something to work on to improve our marriages without pointing the finger anywhere outside ourselves.

One of the best things you or I can do to make our marriages stronger, our married sex hotter and our lives happier, is to commit ourselves to becoming a better person for the benefit and happiness of our spouse. This doesn’t mean putting our spouse at the centre of the universe; it just means understanding the impact we have on the marriage as a whole, and doing our best to make that impact the very best one we can manage.

So ask yourself again: Would I get turned on if I lived with me? If the honest answer is yes, congratulations. Define what makes you so great and do more of it. If the honest answer is hesitant or negative, identify what you can do to improve yourself and start working on those things. By improving yourself you will do your marriage and your hot sex life the world of good, and your spouse won’t fail to notice.

This is part two of my Phone Sex story, so if you haven’t yet read the first part, take a quick detour to Phone Sex - Part I and do so now. Otherwise, read on, and expect explicit language.

     “Lie back on the bed and open your legs, wide.”
     His voice on the other end of the phone was calm yet commanding, and she didn’t hesitate do follow his instructions the moment he had uttered them.
     “Okay,” she said.
     “Where are your hands?”
     “My left is holding the phone.”
     “And your right hand?”
     She smiled and glanced down at her right hand.
      “Stroking.”
      “Stroking what?”
      “You know what.”
      “I do. But I want you to be specific.”
      “I’m stroking my pussy.”
      “Try again.”
      “I’m stroking my hot, tight, pussy. And I’m getting very wet listening to you.”
      She loved the way he always insisted on her stating the obvious, and on describing what she was doing in as much detail as possible. She knew that he got turned on listening to her talk dirty, and if the truth be told, it always turned her on just as much.  
      “Start rubbing your clit,” he said. “And as you do, tell me what you’re thinking.”
      “Okay,” she said. “I’m thinking about the last time I was with you. You had me tied to the bed and you tongue fucked me for what seemed like hours. I looked down at you and saw that animal look you get in your eyes when you’re eating me out.” Although she wasn’t totally aware of it, her right hand was steadily gathering speed as she related the thoughts to him.
      “I made you talk like a dirty slut that night, didn’t I?”
      “Yes,” she said, and her pussy twinged at the memory.
      “Well it would make sense for you to do the same again, seeing as you’re thinking about that night anyway.”
      “What do you want me to say?”
      “Can’t you remember what you said the last time?” he laughed.
      “Oh, I can remember,” she said. The fact was, she’d thought of it constantly for a couple of days, and had to change several pairs of panties as a consequence.
      “Go on then. Talk to me.”
      “I want you to fuck me,” she said.
      “How?”
      “Hard. I want you to make me your dirty little slut. I want you to take me. Own me. Use me.”
      “I am using you. Right now.”
      “God, yeah. I know. And I fucking love it.
      Her right hand was rubbing hard on her clit, which had swollen considerably in the last couple of minutes.
      “I want your cock,” she said. “I need it. So fucking badly.”
      “Keep going, but don’t cum until I say you can.”
      She swallowed hard, her breathing already quite shallow.
      “I want you to pin my hands down above my head and fuck me hard. I want you to call me names.”
      “Like what?”
      “Nasty names. Bitch. Whore. Slut. Call me a cock tease and tell me you’re gonna give it to me hard to teach me a lesson. Oh, god, yes…”
      “Alright. Stop.”
      His voice was firm and final.
      “What?”
      “Take your hand away from your pussy and stop. That’s all for tonight.”
      She did as he commanded, but her clit was aching. Another minute or so and she would have cum big time.
      “You bastard. You can’t expect me to stop, just like that. Finish me.” She gritted her teeth. “Finish me now.”
      “Maybe next time,” he said, and hung up.

* * * * * * * *

      He enjoyed the last mouthful of bourbon and put the empty glass down on the table. A glance at the clock told him it was nine thirty. He rose from his armchair, flicked off the lamp in the corner of the room and headed upstairs.
      You’ve got to keep them keen, he thought with a smile. Besides, she really does love being teased. She just wasn’t expecting you to let her get that far…
      When he reached the top of the stairs he flicked off the hall light and pushed open the door. She threw a cushion at him as soon as he entered the room.
      “That’s for letting me get so worked up,” she said. “You did it deliberately.”
      “Yes,” he said.
      “She tried not to smile, but didn’t quite succeed. “Sometimes I wonder why I ever married you in the first place,” she said.
      “You married me because you knew you’d enjoy playing games like this.”
      He smiled and closed the door. Tonight they’d fuck like demons, and all it had taken was half an hour of creative preparation. Whoever said married sex was boring needed to get themselves some education.

“Say my name, bitch!” is a line from American Pie (delivered brilliantly by Alyson Hannigan) that stays with most people who have seen the movie. “Say my name” – with or without the bitch – is also the title of several popular songs. Now, as if making a further evolutionary leap, it’s the title of this post here at Hot Married Sex.

Married couples tend to call each other lots of different names when having hot sex and even not-so-hot sex. The names range from the gentle babe, honey, love and sweetheart (I’ll stop there before I need a bucket) to the much more intense bastard, bitch and slut. But the most powerful name you can call your partner isn’t any of these. No, the one that works the most magic is so close to home that most of us forget to use it. I am referring, of course, to their Christian name.

What often happens in a marriage is that we get so used to being with our husband or wife that they become, to a great extent, a part of us. This makes for a very comfortable relationship, but it also has its downsides. One downside is that we forget to tell them how much we really care about them (“She should know that by now, dammit!”). Another is that it can make it easier for us to take them for granted. And a third is that we forget to connect directly with them when making love, fucking, having hot sex or whatever else you want to call it.

Imagine how you would feel if, the next time your partner approaches orgasm, they were to look right into your eyes and moan, gasp or scream your real name before finally allowing themselves to be enveloped by their climax. The chances are that hearing them say your name instead of “God!”, “Yes!” or “Yeah Baby!” would have a pretty big impact on you. You’d feel a more intense connection, a greater sense of satisfaction and a more profound feeling of the hot sex having some real meaning.

If you agree with any of that, your homework for the next time you have hot sex is simple: give your husband or wife those incredible feelings by using their real name. Don’t repeat their name throughout the session so that you sound like you’re trying to sell them something, but do be sure to connect with them in this way as you reach your orgasm. It’s a very simple idea, but most people find that it’s a very powerful one.